So, I get all kinds of interesting questions and requests as I travel the country speaking to student organizations, but the one I am addressing this week left even me speechless. Let me explain….recently after a speech a student whom I am going to call R.J.* (name changed to protect his identity) asked if I would be willing to break up with his girlfriend for him. Wait…what? Did he just ask what I think he asked? As a matter of fact…yes, he did! My first reaction to R.J.* was to laugh because surely he can’t be serious, right? Unfortunately, I was wrong. My second thought was that I should call his girlfriend and tell her to “run…far, far away!” But in the end…I didn’t do that. But I did leave R.J.* with some advice. In this week’s video I am going to give R.J.* (and you) the Break Up Guide and how to NOT be a JERK!
Nobody likes breakups. In fact, they suck!! The hardest thing for me during breakups was to be completely honest without making up some lame lie. By keeping these few things in mind, we can move past breakups without making the other person hate you! Because you never know…you may just want to get back together with that person in the future and it would be really hard to get them back if she/he HATES you!!
(***P.S. If you are R.J.’s* now former girlfriend, I hope he manned up enough to tell you himself!)
This is great! Most people are terrible at confrontation and can make an uncomfy situation pretty terrible. Love these tips!
Such GREAT advice!! Love this!! Especially the picking the fight one…. I’ve been the dumpee and the dumper. And I can also attest that dragging it out is the WORST way to go! It’s horrible for both parties, and RJ if you’re reading this, she will subconsciously feel it if you’re thinking it and that’s torture for her! So breaking up as soon as you know is the kindest way to go.
Love this video Amanda!
It’s human nature to avoid conflict, but you’re right – we all need to “man up!” when it comes to face to face communication!
This tip is a great one for ANY communication by the way – I’ve had girlfriends send me LONG text conversations that truly needed to happen over the phone (or better yet, face to face).
In this day and age of technology, it becomes more of a challenge, but for deep and meaningful connections, it’s WORTH it.
This is awesome, Amanda! I’ve found that at any stage of any relationship, calmly (without blame) speaking my truth is one of the most powerful things I can do. Thanks for this great post! Xx
Love this, nice video and so well said!
haha! i love this! he totally needs to man up!
Its also like dealing with difficult situations not only breaking up, dragging out is such a torture!